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Article by woman [Nikita Coulombe] on men's lives and equality

afns1

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https://medium.com/@NikitaCcoulombe/do-women-really-want-equality-4374910f2236#.hty85u880

It ends:
Ultimately, if we actually wanted equality we would be asking men what life is really like for them. Because as long as male roles are limited, female roles will be limited, too. If we actually wanted equality, we would be talking about equal responsibilities alongside equal rights; we would be having honest conversations around biological differences and attraction. Until we do these things, we will find ourselves in a continual gridlock, complaining about such trivial things as manspreading and wondering why we can’t have it all while mistakenly believing men do.
I agree that men's lives need to be looked at more. I feel having a lot more Women's studies research then Men's studies research causes a big imbalance in the perceptions of life for each gender.
 


Vega1447

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EUrJokingMeRight

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Men and women cannot be equal, no more than two people can be equal. We are all different. Differences rarely equate to equality.
 
D

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Men and women cannot be equal, no more than two people can be equal. We are all different. Differences rarely equate to equality.
Most of the Equality warriors are hopelessly confused between equality, equality of opportunity and equality of outcomes.
 

Accidental sock

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Any woman who wishes to be equal to a man, lacks ambition.
 

man-in-street

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Most of the Equality warriors are hopelessly confused between equality, equality of opportunity and equality of outcomes.
Not bad, but inadequate, the only reasonable meaning that can be ascribed to equality between the sexes is " Equality before the law and parity of esteem in all other situations".

Unfortunately this is also inadequate. There is a pervasive feeling in society in general that has almost become a cultural reality, it is that "Sex is something that men do to women".

This means that women are , by definition, victims and men are, by definition, perpetrators.

If I am correct then the next question for men is, "how am I going to do her" and the next question for women becomes "how is he going to do me"

This is where the prevalence of pornography becomes a destructive force in society in that it tends to demonstrate the various ways in which one can either "do" or be "done".

Even though pornography is not real it tends to become the only reality for people who have no terms of reference in the real world and influences the behavior of people who either know no better or who do not have the life experience to know better.

Until the time arrives that we all accept that sexual contact is a two-way street for individual and reciprocal pleasure the nature of "equality" between the sexes will mean whatever a person wants it to mean.

A perpetrator and a victim can never be equal, and can never see each other as equals.
 

silverharp

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it was a good article and many reasonable points which we all take for granted in the real world. Any man that tried to live his life as a male feminist would turn off any woman worth their salt.
 
D

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it was a good article and many reasonable points which we all take for granted in the real world. Any man that tried to live his life as a male feminist would turn off any woman worth their salt.
It also struck me how well written the article was, clear, concise points, no fudge, no waffle, no vague concepts, no dodgy studies cited, no resort to self-serving femilingo, in other words it had all the qualities that the usual feminist bullsh1t lacks. As for male feminists, you'd almost feel sorry for them.:roll:
 

blokesbloke

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I don't think I've ever met two people who were truly equal, or two people who shared the exact same views on equality.

Certainly feminism itself seems an almost meaningless phrase these days as no two feminists seem to agree on a definition of it.

I always say the only thing that gets me angry and makes me feel all radical feminist is when women are referred to as sluts or slags or similar words. I hate that - it really bothers me.

Sadly I just as often hear women say it about other women, which really saddens me. Even some prominent feminists have resorted to this kind of thing.

I have a real thing about it - when I hear a woman being called a slag by men I feel angry. When I hear them called that by other women though, I feel angry but also so desperately sad and helpless.

It's one area I think men and women are not equal in - but some women themselves seem determined to keep that way.
 
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blokesbloke

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I have to say so much of the discussion does seem to come down to relationships between men and women in a heterosexual sense.

I wouldn't want to be a straight man now - I think I'd find it utterly bewildering.

I tend to get on great with women because there's simply no tension there - I don't have any ulterior motive with any women I meet and they know that.

Apart from having greater sexual freedom, though, I don't think I have any privileges over women in today's society.

Perhaps I do and don't realise it, but I don't think so.

I don't know - often I don't even think about being a man - I'm just a person. There is no typical male or female as each individual is unique.

I think identity politics is quite sad, it reduces us all to rival tribes and denies our basic humanity, and provides ready-made excuses for failure.
 

silverharp

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It also struck me how well written the article was, clear, concise points, no fudge, no waffle, no vague concepts, no dodgy studies cited, no resort to self-serving femilingo, in other words it had all the qualities that the usual feminist bullsh1t lacks. As for male feminists, you'd almost feel sorry for them.:roll:
indeed, its pretty much an admission that man cant compete or take charge when needed , very unsexy from a woman's perspective, pretty much guaranteed that they will monkey branch on to better things if they get involved with a male feminist
 
D

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I don't think I've ever met two people who were truly equal, or two people who shared the exact same views on equality.

Certainly feminism itself seems an almost meaningless phrase these days as no two feminists seem to agree on a definition of it.

I always say the only thing that gets me angry and makes me feel all radical feminist is when women are referred to as sluts or slags or similar words. I hate that - it really bothers me.

Sadly I just as often hear women say it about other women, which really saddens me.

I despair of women who use such terms.

It's one area I think men and women are not equal in - but some women themselves seem determined to keep that way.
Nor have I, Blokes, and let's be grateful for that, but the problem is that there is a belief among some that we should all be equal, and they are quite happy to use discriminatory measures to attempt to achieve this unachievable "equality". Real inequalities persist in our society, but they are primarily economic. Take education, for example, where we claim equality of access to third level education. There is no equality, your social-economic background determines to a very large extent your likelihood of securing a place on any of the "professional" courses.
So we have inequality, rampant inequality, where our futures are decided from birth, but it's not gender related.
 

*EPIC SUCCESS*

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Everyone should be afforded equality of opportunity.

No two people will ever be equal, but they should at least have broadly equal chances in life, irrespective of their background, gender, race, sexuality, material wealth or perceived 'class'.
 

silverharp

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I always say the only thing that gets me angry and makes me feel all radical feminist is when women are referred to as sluts or slags or similar words. I hate that - it really bothers me.

Sadly I just as often hear women say it about other women, which really saddens me. Even some prominent feminists have resorted to this kind of thing.

I have a real thing about it - when I hear a woman being called a slag by men I feel angry. When I hear them called that by other women though, I feel angry but also so desperately sad and helpless.

It's one area I think men and women are not equal in - but some women themselves seem determined to keep that way.
is it the words themselves or the realty behind it? its one of the few things a man ought to judge women on if he is looking for a long term relationship, ie is your potential partner promiscuous or not? the feminist ideal seems to be that a woman ought to be able to have a "sex n the city" lifestyle in ther 20's and then find some simp when in their 30's to settle down with. Most guys are figuring out that this is a bad deal for them
 

GDPR

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Interesting article.

Some home truths, a few half truths and one or two dodgy truths, still, any alternative view to the mindless acceptance of today's "popular" view is always to be welcomed.
 

*EPIC SUCCESS*

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is it the words themselves or the realty behind it? its one of the few things a man ought to judge women on if he is looking for a long term relationship, ie is your potential partner promiscuous or not? the feminist ideal seems to be that a woman ought to be able to have a "sex n the city" lifestyle in ther 20's and then find some simp when in their 30's to settle down with. Most guys are figuring out that this is a bad deal for them
Why would a womans past sexual relations be a bad deal for a man? Unless of course the man in question already had preexisting sexual hang ups. I suppose in a situation like that, a man like that would probably be best of off with someone as sad and damaged as themselves, although that would hardly be a good basis for a healthy, loving relationship.
 

P.ieire

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There seems to be a real concerted effort over the last while to market victim identity politics to men. I wonder if there's an invisible evolutionary hand puppeteering the critical theorists.
 

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