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Health Minister Reilly to subsidise "preventive sex"


cashinhand

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 13, 2007
Messages
919
Minister for Health, James Reilly has agreed a program of subsidies with Minister for Finance Michael Noonan ahead of Budget 2012 aimed at promoting "more activity in the Irish bedroom".

"As regular sex helps prevent prostate cancer in men and general crankiness and headaches in both men and women, and is an excellent cardiovascular workout, I have convinced the Department of Finance to roll-out a series of subsidies from January 1st," the Minister said in a statement today.

Proof of activity will have to be provided on a quarterly basis to satisfy the new sex inspectors who will be employed to keep records - based on minutes of copulation, number of ejaculations and names and addresses of partners. Copulation shall be liberally defined, including most modern-day adult intra-human activity.

The Minister expects the subsidies will cost 6 billion euros in a full year, rising to 11 billion by 2015, but will be fully offset by increased wellbeing, productivity, reduced visits to GPs and hospitals, and interest reductions expected from the bailout troika.

Applications can be made online under www.sexsubsidy.gov.ie
 

ruserious

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 3, 2011
Messages
29,597
How bout the poor w@nkin' bankers?
 
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