Parenthood

Happycamping

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Dec 1, 2016
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Hi all, this is probably going to seem a bit self indulgent but here goes.

My wife recently had a baby. First time fatherhood for me - Woohoo! Anyway, the point of the thread is to ask parents out there for any advice they might have or to point me in the direction of any valuable resources. I wasn't really sure where to put the thread so I am trying here. It will probably end up in chat but might be nice to get a bit of traction before it does. Thanks in advance piesters!
 


Half Nelson

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Dec 12, 2009
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Too late!

;)
 

cnocpm

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Jan 13, 2011
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Hi all, this is probably going to seem a bit self indulgent but here goes.

My wife recently had a baby. First time fatherhood for me - Woohoo! Anyway, the point of the thread is to ask parents out there for any advice they might have or to point me in the direction of any valuable resources. I wasn't really sure where to put the thread so I am trying here. It will probably end up in chat but might be nice to get a bit of traction before it does. Thanks in advance piesters!
Be gentle changing the diaper, in the hope the compliment is returned.
 

ger12

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Feb 25, 2011
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47,680
Congratulations. God but I still find it hard, and still find it rewarding.

Stock up on the Calpol etc now, s/he's likely to be too young right now but when the first time there's a bit of a temperature (at 2am when you're talking to the Doc on call) you'll be glad to be prepared.

Steve Biddulph has published books on raising boys and raising girls. I've just stared one (bit late for me) but seems to be a sensible head.
Home

If you and herself mind each other, make time for each other a priority always, life and parenthood will be more manageable, much more.

And trust your instinct.
 

Betson

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Feb 7, 2013
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16,716
Hi all, this is probably going to seem a bit self indulgent but here goes.

My wife recently had a baby. First time fatherhood for me - Woohoo! Anyway, the point of the thread is to ask parents out there for any advice they might have or to point me in the direction of any valuable resources. I wasn't really sure where to put the thread so I am trying here. It will probably end up in chat but might be nice to get a bit of traction before it does. Thanks in advance piesters!
Relax , you have done your job for now , your job does not kick in again until the kid is old enough to kick a football or maybe the odd bedtime story when they are old enough to look for one.
 

Happycamping

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Dec 1, 2016
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Relax , you have done your job for now , your job does not kick in again until the kid is old enough to kick a football or maybe the odd bedtime story when they are old enough to look for one.
I take it, you are not a parent?
 

gatsbygirl20

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Dec 1, 2008
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Congratulations. A wonderful phase in your life is just beginning--although admittedly it will seem more wonderful in retrospect than when it's actually happening.

Forget resources.

Try to get some sleep.

Take care of yourself and your wife--not just the baby.

Babies are tough little feckers. Don't feel guilty if you don't jump to attention every time you hear a cry. Be gentle with yourself. Muddle along.

A lot of the stuff people obsess about makes no difference in the end.---the importance of constantly stimulating the child...breastfeeding as the new religion, etc...etc..

Try to relax. This is just your family now--the place you should be your real self, happy and at ease. It does not have to be An Important New Project Where You Can Fail--sort of like an extension of your work.

Being a new parent can dredge up old issues from our own childhood--strange fears and anxieties that flare and flicker.. This is natural. Stay philosophical.

There will be good times ahead. It'll be lovely. Well done.
 

truthisfree

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Jul 16, 2009
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6,186
Hi all, this is probably going to seem a bit self indulgent but here goes.

My wife recently had a baby. First time fatherhood for me - Woohoo! Anyway, the point of the thread is to ask parents out there for any advice they might have or to point me in the direction of any valuable resources. I wasn't really sure where to put the thread so I am trying here. It will probably end up in chat but might be nice to get a bit of traction before it does. Thanks in advance piesters!
Take a deep breath :D Best of luck :)
 

GDPR

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Jul 5, 2008
Messages
217,846
Hi all, this is probably going to seem a bit self indulgent but here goes.

My wife recently had a baby. First time fatherhood for me - Woohoo! Anyway, the point of the thread is to ask parents out there for any advice they might have or to point me in the direction of any valuable resources. I wasn't really sure where to put the thread so I am trying here. It will probably end up in chat but might be nice to get a bit of traction before it does. Thanks in advance piesters!
Spend as much time with them as you can and enjoy it, you will get as much if not more in return for your efforts as they will.

Read a bit too, there's lots of odd stuff going on with the young growing mind and body that if you have a better understanding of it will help greatly to direct your efforts to most effect.

But mostly just enjoy them, you won't believe this, no one really does, but it'll be over in a flash. Most likely one of the most important and meaningful things that will happen in your life, just happened for you, appreciate it and as I said, enjoy it.
 

GDPR

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You are going to need a lot of financial resources.

Without knowing your personal situation, I cant point you in the right direction.

As regards personal resources, well all I can advise you is this child is not about you. Being a parent means realising you are in control of nothing.

Its the biggest moment for a lot of people when they see that.

Up to then, you have always had the idea in the back of your mind that you can get away, you can get out, you can go on re-inventing yourself. You cant now.

But its not all bad. Children are hard-wired to love their parents. You would have to be Satan before they didnt. Cherish that and respect that.

And just do your best. It will be your own best, and your kid will love you.
 

Happycamping

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Dec 1, 2016
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You are going to need a lot of financial resources.

Without knowing your personal situation, I cant point you in the right direction.

As regards personal resources, well all I can advise you is this child is not about you. Being a parent means realising you are in control of nothing.

Its the biggest moment for a lot of people when they see that.

Up to then, you have always had the idea in the back of your mind that you can get away, you can get out, you can go on re-inventing yourself. You cant now.

But its not all bad. Children are hard-wired to love their parents. You would have to be Satan before they didnt. Cherish that and respect that.

And just do your best. It will be your own best, and your kid will love you.
We are fairly comfortable at the moment. Both in decent jobs. I think we can definitely afford one or two(please God). Not sure about more than that.
 

NiallGK

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Sep 16, 2009
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345
At times it might seem like hell on earth but trust me, once they start to talk to you, it all makes perfect sense.
 

Ellen Ripley

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Feb 5, 2014
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Congratulations!

You haven't said if it's a boy or a girl?

As Tonic said, make the most of the Now.
The demanding early years are wonderful, exhausting as they are-- so many 'Firsts'-- and they fly by.
There will come a time when you would be willing to give everything you have to get just 5 mins of that back...

In the moments when you look at this tiny perfect thing, and wonder how you could ever love them more than you do right now... you will, as every age has something to recommend it.

Good Luck, and God Bless Baby.
 

Happycamping

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Dec 1, 2016
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Congratulations!

You haven't said if it's a boy or a girl?

As Tonic said, make the most of the Now.
The demanding early years are wonderful, exhausting as they are-- so many 'Firsts'-- and they fly by.
There will come a time when you would be willing to give everything you have to get just 5 mins of that back...

In the moments when you look at this tiny perfect thing, and wonder how you could ever love them more than you do right now... you will, as every age has something to recommend it.

Good Luck, and God Bless Baby.
A boy. Already been a rollercoaster. Enjoying every minute!
 

ShoutingIsLeadership

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Jan 17, 2011
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Congratulations :)

Now, to your thread - you started a thread about it...you're interested and you care. You'll therefore be absolutely fine.

Trust your instinct and don't overly worry.

Enjoy these years of utter dependency on you both. It's a huge privilege...not without its challenges, but just remember that you won't get these days back...don't wish them away.

One other thing...keep a diary...you'll treasure it, one day.
 


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