Spousal abuse double standard revealed

commentator

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If rebekah Wade - spouse beating editor of the Sun - were a man her arrest would have been greeted with howls of outrage and instant dismissal and Grauniad luvvies on about how Page 3 is depraved and what can we expect etc etc etc.. Instead we get sniggers on BBC Newsnight about "Ginger ninjas" and applause from her employees.

John Waters does tend to go on and on about this but this shows that the whole idea of women beating husbands - a commonplace event - is really not treated at all seriously.
 


smiffy

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commentator said:
If rebekah Wade - spouse beating editor of the Sun - were a man her arrest would have been greeted with howls of outrage and instant dismissal and Grauniad luvvies on about how Page 3 is depraved and what can we expect etc etc etc.. Instead we get sniggers on BBC Newsnight about "Ginger ninjas" and applause from her employees.
Probably, although it's also reasonable to suggest that the incident got far more coverage precisely because she was a woman (as well as because of the bizarre coincidence of the guy who plays Phil Mitchell also being assaulted by a woman on the same day). When was the last time a single incident of domestic violence (irrespective of the gender of the perpetrator) got this level of coverage?
 

martin TYRONE

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I have in my possession a police scanner and every weekend I hear a report of domestic dispute comming from a house that I will only refer to as number 19--the Gardai no longer take these complaints seriously because every time they go there the couple say everything is alright hugs kisses all around

--I ve even heard the gardai on the radio [with the woman talking in the background] '' all units the love birds at no 19 are all hugs and kisses theres no problem and everything is rosey in the garden''

Is it any wonder that the gardai dont bother wasting their time with the likes of these idiots who keep crying wolf and seem to get their thrills in ''the making up''
 

Gombeen

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commentator said:
If rebekah Wade - spouse beating editor of the Sun - were a man her arrest would have been greeted with howls of outrage and instant dismissal and Grauniad luvvies on about how Page 3 is depraved and what can we expect etc etc etc.. Instead we get sniggers on BBC Newsnight about "Ginger ninjas" and applause from her employees.

John Waters does tend to go on and on about this but this shows that the whole idea of women beating husbands - a commonplace event - is really not treated at all seriously.
I agree completely. Whatever about the irony of the situation, it does display a large amount of double standards. Especially when I read that the Sun have had an ongoing campaign against domestic violence recently.
 

Risteard

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martin TYRONE said:
I have in my possession a police scanner and every weekend I hear a report of domestic dispute comming from a house that I will only refer to as number 19--the Gardai no longer take these complaints seriously because every time they go there the couple say everything is alright hugs kisses all around

--I ve even heard the gardai on the radio [with the woman talking in the background] '' all units the love birds at no 19 are all hugs and kisses theres no problem and everything is rosey in the garden''

Is it any wonder that the gardai dont bother wasting their time with the likes of these idiots who keep crying wolf and seem to get their thrills in ''the making up''
Of course martin TYRONE is joking - he does not use a scanner to listen to the Gardaí, nor does he act upon information received I am quite sure.
 

agora

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I have in my possession a police scanner and every weekend I hear a report of domestic dispute comming from a house that I will only refer to as number 19--the Gardai no longer take these complaints seriously because every time they go there the couple say everything is alright hugs kisses all around

--I ve even heard the gardai on the radio [with the woman talking in the background] '' all units the love birds at no 19 are all hugs and kisses theres no problem and everything is rosey in the garden''

Is it any wonder that the gardai dont bother wasting their time with the likes of these idiots who keep crying wolf and seem to get their thrills in ''the making up''








Or maybe it could be that the victimised spouse (I'm not preguessing which one it is), is so terrified and yet dependent on his/her spouse that when the (none too observant) Guards come round he/she makes excuses for him/her and pretends that everything is fine.

Many people in abusive relationships convince themselves that the violence is their fault and even if they go to the stage of calling the Gardai, that guilt and the sense of dependence which psychological abuse can bring, often leads them to feel protective towards their partner and to do anything to avoid getting them into trouble, even to the extent of denying anything is the matter.
 

martin TYRONE

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Look lads its quite simple -this is the 21 st century and its a womans world

If she hits you--you must have said something or did something to her

If she does the dirt on you----shes a single woman free to do what ever she pleases

If you split up ---you should be greatful to have the oportunity of her spreading malicious rumours about you-and that she is helped in doing this by a group of gossip mongering bad minded bitches and dedicated diesel and lipstick dikes-who cant wait to leap on the bandwagon of the cause of the poor down trodden women

--you should be greatful that you might just be able to afford a flat so that her, her new jigilo and your kids who now call the new fella dady and the same kids that you never see-because she has run to the gardai and lied about you being abusive a term that covers just about anything that she doesnt like-- can all live in your former home while you pay maintenance towards her and her new stud who has more than likely never worked a day in his life.


And remember lads she is always in the right no matter how she behaves-----PMT is a get out clause for everything.
 

TheBear

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martin TYRONE said:
Look lads its quite simple -this is the 21 st century and its a womans world

If she hits you--you must have said something or did something to her

If she does the dirt on you----shes a single woman free to do what ever she pleases

If you split up ---you should be greatful to have the oportunity of her spreading malicious rumours about you-and that she is helped in doing this by a group of gossip mongering bad minded bitches and dedicated diesel and lipstick dikes-who cant wait to leap on the bandwagon of the cause of the poor down trodden women

--you should be greatful that you might just be able to afford a flat so that her, her new jigilo and your kids who now call the new fella dady and the same kids that you never see-because she has run to the gardai and lied about you being abusive a term that covers just about anything that she doesnt like-- can all live in your former home while you pay maintenance towards her and her new stud who has more than likely never worked a day in his life.


And remember lads she is always in the right no matter how she behaves-----PMT is a get out clause for everything.
If this is a joke, you should work harder at making it funny. Otherwise, it is (to coin a phrase) beneath contempt!

Ok, it is serious that there is a double standard, but to claim that it's a woman's world and that there's a big conspiracy whereby the (male-dominated) legal and juducual professions favour womankind is just laughable.

I think the reason that it got so much coverage is the fact that the husband in question is a big guy, and one who plays an abusive w*nker in one programme and a big tough guy (whose wife left him) in another.
 

martin TYRONE

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Well I remember a few years back on a night out in Dublin with a group of friends---a couple broke up and the female took off her high-heel shoe and started belting the fella about the head in the process seriously injuring one of his eyes--he never raised his hands to her----we all went to the Gardai station----[It wasnt my idea Risteard]--the Free state police thought it very funny----agh sheeaye gaave ye a beaten diid shey--guffaws all around-----until one of the lads said if they found the matter so trivial would they have any objections if he found the woman and did the exact same thing to her as she had to his friends eye---then the boys in blue stopped laughing---ye cant be doing that--its not right----Double standards or what ????
 

martin TYRONE

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but to claim that it's a woman's world and that there's a big conspiracy whereby the (male-dominated) legal and juducual professions favour womankind is just laughable.


So you dont believe that the courts favour womankind in cases of seperation and child custody---that they are completly unbiased

-----I speak my mind and will do so without being afraid of upturning the politically correct apple cart--I dont cow tow to a group of militant feminists out of fear
 

Janis

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Two women killed every week in the UK by their partners, and no men are killed by theirs, every year the same. If its a womans world out there, no one told all those dead people.
 

martin TYRONE

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Imm remember that black widow down in Wicklow---BTW I am not pro-woman beating as you will see from the thread that I started about abuse of woman some time back---what I am against is double standards--the story of domestic abuse goes both ways not just one

In Ireland we have a lot of evil b**ches--both male and female
 

Janis

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I know, but I am just not sure what the stats are for spousal abuse here. In any event, I think the fact that the Black Widow had to hire some one to do the old boy in and could nt manage it herslef is the whole thing in a nutshell. The harrowing tales of wives (hospitalised, on average, 35 times before they quit the abuser) too terrified to even go out to the shop if husband 'forbid' it, ir get a hair cut or a pet or what ever- it is so very different from hired assasins for the insurance money, really, isn't it?
 

martin TYRONE

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I disagree with you though that no husbands have been murdered by their wives--indeed I have read of cases in USA-where a woman stabs himself numerous times then claims self defence and is believed--who really knows whether she just killed him in cold blood or not---I will post the details of such cases later when I have more time---BTW there really isnt all that much difference in hiring someone to kill and doing it yourself in the case of the black widow her motivation was to conceal her crime by blaminging it on a robbery or the Ira or whoever.
 

Justin

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Had this argument with a feminist who denied it was a problem because "if it was we would know about it".Thought that was very strange because the abuse of women within families only became regarded as a social problem due the highlighting of it by feminism.Of course physical and emotional abuse by women against men is a reality.It doesn't make it less of a reality because it hasn't gained the status of a social problem( neither would admitting its existence downplay the extent of men's abuse against women).Interesting topic in itself is examining how problems become defined and accepted due to the exercise of political power(a further example would be the current discourse surrounding clerical child abuse).Abuse is abuse at the end of the day.
 

Janis

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Ithink the difference is in the ten or fifteen years of hell the women go through first and the sheer number who are actually killed by comparion to the number of men killed. Of course it does not matter what gender the recipient is, or the abuser. Weirdly the percentage of women abused by their female partners is exactly the same as the percentage abused by their men. That fairly had me head turned I can tell you.
 

TheBear

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Justin said:
Had this argument with a feminist who denied it was a problem because "if it was we would know about it".Thought that was very strange because the abuse of women within families only became regarded as a social problem due the highlighting of it by feminism.Of course physical and emotional abuse by women against men is a reality.It doesn't make it less of a reality because it hasn't gained the status of a social problem( neither would admitting its existence downplay the extent of men's abuse against women).Interesting topic in itself is examining how problems become defined and accepted due to the exercise of political power(a further example would be the current discourse surrounding clerical child abuse).Abuse is abuse at the end of the day.
At the risk of again being labelled a militant feminist, I often note the use of language in this debate: there is often talk of wife-beating and 'physical and emotional abuse by women of thier husbands'. Emotional abuse is not one-sided, just as physical abuse is not. (though this is not to deny any of the facts of the situation)
 

martin TYRONE

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Another little trick used by the militant feminists is to---brand mens support groups as wimpy or gay in their efforts to stop men standing up for their rights as fathers and ex-husbands------------even though the same feminists pride themselves on the support networks for women that they have created.
 


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