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Were you bullied in school? Did you bully anyone in school?


Truth.ie

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Joined
Oct 5, 2008
Messages
28,077
I was thinking of this,when I heard about the young girls (13 years old) in Donegal being questioned by Gardai in relation to the suicide of Erin Gallagher.
Thats an awful young age to have the death of anyone to carry on your shoulders.

It made me think of my schooldays, pre internet and mobile phone of course, so there was no cyber bullying.
The bully was in your face, toe to toe.
There was a pecking order, with one bully picking a weaker kid, and that weaker kid picking an even weaker kid etc.
Hand on heart, looking back now there were kids in my class I did bully, and there were times I also felt bullied.
Not violently, but I did make fun of them, mock them and generally made them feel small.
At the time it was not a big social discussion, there were no Counsellors and child psycholigists. It was seen as part of growing up.
On reflection, and as a father now, I feel horrible when I think back on this.
I often met these fellow classmates in later years, as adults. And we greeted and chatted and said goodbye and went our ways.
I often wonder if they still hold animosities from childhood days.
When I think of those young girls who now have to carry the burden of living in a small town like Letterkenny, and being blamed for the death of a classmate, I can't help feeling sorry for them.
I think very few people can look back and say they didn't bully or pick on someone at least once.
Were you a bully? Were you bullied?
 

Roman Emperor

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Joined
May 20, 2011
Messages
10,158
...There was a pecking order, with one bully picking a weaker kid, and that weaker kid picking an even weaker kid etc....
Big fleas have little fleas upon their backs to bite them. And little fleas have lesser fleas, and so, ad infinitum.-The Siphonaptera
 

EvotingMachine0197

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Joined
Feb 17, 2006
Messages
8,629
Maybe a bit of both, but probably more bullied than bully.

There were occasions when I got a few smacks from the same lads, but I was able to deal with that eventually through diplomatic channels.

My bullying of others never amounted to more than slagging. Slagging is grand I think, until it becomes persistent, personal and many against one. Thinking back, I did do a bit of that - not good.

The biggest bullies in my school though, were two christian brothers. The fcking ************************s.
 

cathalbrugha

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Joined
Jun 29, 2011
Messages
9,215
Wine socks, Brown george webs and a pair of dungerees.. Of course I's bullied.. I's blessed that the bloke next to me had ears twice the size of mine.. Of course we called him FA Cup.. As kids do.. It's hard to tell with kids.. When they tell you they're being bullied and they're squeezing a tear out at the same time as they're talkin' about switching school.. That's where the Yup Yup Rule comes in.. What's the Yup Yup Rule.. Yup the Yard .. Get off that wall yar buildin'.. When I's your age I ne'er missed a day etc.

It's a hard one to call.. I'm a bit old fashioned in that way.. A sneaky social conservative.. I think all kids should just shur up and go to school.. After that everythings hunky dory as far as I'm concerned..
 

Seanie Lemass

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Joined
Nov 26, 2010
Messages
20,159
Was neither. We were raised not to be either. And my daughter is the same. And she stood up for one of her chums who was being bullied. Was so proud of her. Only thing most of them require is someone to face them down, Failing that a good hiding.
 

cathalbrugha

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Joined
Jun 29, 2011
Messages
9,215
OP - It made me think of my schooldays, pre internet and mobile phone of course, so there was no cyber bullying.

That's the problem isn't it - t'internet.. Generation gap.. My kid came home one day and told me one of her mates was being bullied for being gay.. I told her to stick up for him and went half ballistic over it.. But when she told me she was having the same argument with her grandmother I felt guilty as she's an old catholic type who just doesn't get the 'change'.. But a good person nonetheless..

When it leads to the death of a teen it's an understatement to call it tragic but we really don't know what happened.. I actually haven't a clue about this particular case.. Just sad..
 

Gracchus

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Joined
Oct 25, 2011
Messages
660
I was never bullied and I never bullied anyone, but do feel guilty about not standing up for the people I seen being bullied.

I have no pity for them girls who bullied this girl to death, such a tragedy, a life lost for nothing.
 

Round tower

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 9, 2011
Messages
6,894
I was thinking of this,when I heard about the young girls (13 years old) in Donegal being questioned by Gardai in relation to the suicide of Erin Gallagher.
Thats an awful young age to have the death of anyone to carry on your shoulders.

It made me think of my schooldays, pre internet and mobile phone of course, so there was no cyber bullying.
The bully was in your face, toe to toe.
There was a pecking order, with one bully picking a weaker kid, and that weaker kid picking an even weaker kid etc.
Hand on heart, looking back now there were kids in my class I did bully, and there were times I also felt bullied.
Not violently, but I did make fun of them, mock them and generally made them feel small.
At the time it was not a big social discussion, there were no Counsellors and child psycholigists. It was seen as part of growing up.
On reflection, and as a father now, I feel horrible when I think back on this.
I often met these fellow classmates in later years, as adults. And we greeted and chatted and said goodbye and went our ways.
I often wonder if they still hold animosities from childhood days.
When I think of those young girls who now have to carry the burden of living in a small town like Letterkenny, and being blamed for the death of a classmate, I can't help feeling sorry for them.
I think very few people can look back and say they didn't bully or pick on someone at least once.
Were you a bully? Were you bullied?
The girls whp bullied the girl in Donegal deserve no sympathy, they put this on themselves,years ago you got naybe bullird at school and you could go home, now you can't with text messages and facebook, them girls has a chance to get over it, the girl in Donegal will never get the chance.
I heard what one school done to stop a bully,say this person was good at say art,music or sports, so what they were good at they stopped them doing it and they had a good improvement on them
 

EvotingMachine0197

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Joined
Feb 17, 2006
Messages
8,629
I was never bullied and I never bullied anyone, but do feel guilty about not standing up for the people I seen being bullied.

I have no pity for them girls who bullied this girl to death, such a tragedy, a life lost for nothing.
I do, because they knew not what they were doing.

Why does it always take an atheist to point out what jesus would have said?
 

BlackLion

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Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
4,856
I was both and i regret bulling. I kinda got abit of a messiah complex later on in life for defending people being bullied and picked on and nearly got stabbed once for it for jumping in nearly ever fight i came across. Part of me likes the fact i got bullied cause i am a lot stronger person than most people and i see my bullies now and then i can happily say i strong while they are weak. suffering builds character as they say

Most people are lazy by nature and will fall into ruts. We are not all what we want to be and look for ways to get power and to feel good. this is were bullies are born. All people abuse power, its not just polticians or bankers that do it. we all abuse power. parents, teachers older brothers and sisters, gardi and so on. anyone that has power abuse it one way or another.

I feel sorry for the dead girl but i also feel sorry for the bullies, cause mostly they are young and i believe they didn't truely know that they were doing.they wrote abuse on a computer and sent it to someone they knew, while us the audience of this tragic play do the jeering at the actors left to hear us. People should look on here and social networks and see the bullying of the bullies. the only difference is that the bullies on here and elsewhere sent abuse in an indirect way.

The circle continues.......
 

ArtyisBack

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Joined
Sep 2, 2009
Messages
6,090
I dropped a desk over the stairs on top of a guy who tried to bully me - I missed unfortunately, however the ensuing hoo haa ensured everything was sorted - that and the priest knocking the ************************ out of the two of us. But that is the way I was reared. If you cant handle them with the fist the nearest weapon will do.

Them was the days
 

BlackLion

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Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
4,856
I dropped a desk over the stairs on top of a guy who tried to bully me - I missed unfortunately, however the ensuing hoo haa ensured everything was sorted - that and the priest knocking the ************************ out of the two of us. But that is the way I was reared. If you cant handle them with the fist the nearest weapon will do.

Them was the days
alot of bullies only understand the fist. telling people about just makes it worse IMO.
 

Ireniall

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 7, 2011
Messages
8,160
I was thinking of this,when I heard about the young girls (13 years old) in Donegal being questioned by Gardai in relation to the suicide of Erin Gallagher.
Thats an awful young age to have the death of anyone to carry on your shoulders.

It made me think of my schooldays, pre internet and mobile phone of course, so there was no cyber bullying.
The bully was in your face, toe to toe.
There was a pecking order, with one bully picking a weaker kid, and that weaker kid picking an even weaker kid etc.
Hand on heart, looking back now there were kids in my class I did bully, and there were times I also felt bullied.
Not violently, but I did make fun of them, mock them and generally made them feel small.
At the time it was not a big social discussion, there were no Counsellors and child psycholigists. It was seen as part of growing up.
On reflection, and as a father now, I feel horrible when I think back on this.
I often met these fellow classmates in later years, as adults. And we greeted and chatted and said goodbye and went our ways.
I often wonder if they still hold animosities from childhood days.
When I think of those young girls who now have to carry the burden of living in a small town like Letterkenny, and being blamed for the death of a classmate, I can't help feeling sorry for them.
I think very few people can look back and say they didn't bully or pick on someone at least once.
Were you a bully? Were you bullied?
When I moved to my new school as an eight year old many years ago now I found that at lunch time there was an established routine of choosing one of the kids as a rabbit while the others chased him around the yard and threw the scuts of apples and such at him.After a few of these games I realised that it was always the same chap who was the rabbit.I loved every minute of it and I never thought about the victim for a second.After a couple of weeks I arrived out in the yard one day to find that the others had decided to stop doing it.Why? I enquired,disappointed.'Because it's not fair' was the reply.A lump came in my throat as I realised what a pryke I had been.I still occassionally see the guy who said that to me and I have a kind of quiet respect for him.Decades later I discovered that the young lad who was our victim was from a Traveller family.
 

EvotingMachine0197

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 17, 2006
Messages
8,629
I dropped a desk over the stairs on top of a guy who tried to bully me - I missed unfortunately, however the ensuing hoo haa ensured everything was sorted - that and the priest knocking the ************************ out of the two of us. But that is the way I was reared. If you cant handle them with the fist the nearest weapon will do.

Them was the days
Watch out Chuck fecking Norris.
 

Gracchus

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 25, 2011
Messages
660
I do, because they knew not what they were doing.

Why does it always take an atheist to point out what jesus would have said?
Well it is very hard (for me anyway) to have any pity for them.
Hopefully other young people will learn from this.
 

EvotingMachine0197

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Joined
Feb 17, 2006
Messages
8,629
Well it is very hard (for me anyway) to have any pity for them.
Hopefully other young people will learn from this.
Well, imagine you are 13 years old.
Then imagine a girl you know commits suicide.
Then imagine the feeling inside, knowing you contributed to the suicide.
Now think about the girl's family and friends.

How do you feel?
 

cathalbrugha

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 29, 2011
Messages
9,215
Well, imagine you are 13 years old.
Then imagine a girl you know commits suicide.
Then imagine the feeling inside, knowing you contributed to the suicide.
Now think about the girl's family and friends.

How do you feel?
I'm after reading up about it and seemingly it's not the first time it's happened..

Sindo-
Erin took her own life last weekend at her home in Co Donegal. Fifteen-year-old Ciara Pugsley died by suicide near her home in Co Leitrim in September. Both Erin and Ciara had been taunted by vile messages by anonymous posters on ask.fm.

But the website's founder Mark Terebin insisted the media was "knocking on the wrong door".

They're actually making a documentary about it - 'Nowhere to turn: The Battle Against Cyberbullying'..

A Complex problem, but he's adamant it's got nothing to do with him, as his site is based in Latvia.. He said-"It is necessary to go deeper and to find a root of a problem. Its not about the site, the problem is about education, about moral values that were devaluated lately,"

He doesn't want to take any responsibility and has made no effort to moderate his site which is basically for kids.. Why would he? He's a businessman.. What a total pr1ck.com

Forgive them they know full well what they do?
 

mothball

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
683
Getting up for work now and jogging the memory. Hmmm....I was never really bullied. The most popular kids in the school would try be the most pretentious ************************s you could meet. I would see their popularity and raise them a sense of insanity. I would pretend to be the class nut in order to cause them some concern. They'd leaver their water drinking habits aside in order not to be stabbed by the school nutcase....oh, the amount of fun I had.


Anyway, years on, I still giggle a little at the idea of scaring teenagers. ...So.. :D I should get to work and earn some money.
 

patslatt

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 11, 2007
Messages
13,693
I was thinking of this,when I heard about the young girls (13 years old) in Donegal being questioned by Gardai in relation to the suicide of Erin Gallagher.
Thats an awful young age to have the death of anyone to carry on your shoulders.

It made me think of my schooldays, pre internet and mobile phone of course, so there was no cyber bullying.
The bully was in your face, toe to toe.
There was a pecking order, with one bully picking a weaker kid, and that weaker kid picking an even weaker kid etc.
Hand on heart, looking back now there were kids in my class I did bully, and there were times I also felt bullied.
Not violently, but I did make fun of them, mock them and generally made them feel small.
At the time it was not a big social discussion, there were no Counsellors and child psycholigists. It was seen as part of growing up.
On reflection, and as a father now, I feel horrible when I think back on this.
I often met these fellow classmates in later years, as adults. And we greeted and chatted and said goodbye and went our ways.
I often wonder if they still hold animosities from childhood days.
When I think of those young girls who now have to carry the burden of living in a small town like Letterkenny, and being blamed for the death of a classmate, I can't help feeling sorry for them.
I think very few people can look back and say they didn't bully or pick on someone at least once.
Were you a bully? Were you bullied?
BULLYING AN EVOLUTIONARY DEVELOPMENT?

Man in nature undoubtedly bullied his fellow man,presumably an evolutionary development that helped foster aggression needed for survival in warfare with competing tribes.Bullies are natural attackers,probably because of family genes. Victims of bullying must painfully learn to fight back against the bullies or develop cunning ways to avoid being bullied,possibly by forming friendships with protectors. Those who fail to find a defence against bullying often lead a miserable existence,hence the risk of suicides.

In my boarding school in the old days,teenage boys were confined to a prison like space despite the hundreds of acres of school grounds,undoubtedly to prevent outbreaks of homosexuality. This confinement made the boys constantly irritable and truculent,and fistfights were breaking out almost daily. Bullying was endemic but the culture was never to complain to the priests in charge for fear of being called a "squealer". In the worst incident in my five years there,three boys gang raped a boy. The priests expelled all three almost immediately,sending them home by taxi across Ireland.
 

EvotingMachine0197

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 17, 2006
Messages
8,629
I'm after reading up about it and seemingly it's not the first time it's happened..

Sindo-
Erin took her own life last weekend at her home in Co Donegal. Fifteen-year-old Ciara Pugsley died by suicide near her home in Co Leitrim in September. Both Erin and Ciara had been taunted by vile messages by anonymous posters on ask.fm.

But the website's founder Mark Terebin insisted the media was "knocking on the wrong door".

They're actually making a documentary about it - 'Nowhere to turn: The Battle Against Cyberbullying'..

A Complex problem, but he's adamant it's got nothing to do with him, as his site is based in Latvia.. He said-"It is necessary to go deeper and to find a root of a problem. Its not about the site, the problem is about education, about moral values that were devaluated lately,"

He doesn't want to take any responsibility and has made no effort to moderate his site which is basically for kids.. Why would he? He's a businessman.. What a total pr1ck.com

Forgive them they know full well what they do?
Yes, it was a girl called Ciara Pugsley. There was a thread on here about it, about 8 weeks ago but I think it got pulled.

It was the same site that was involved. ask.fm

It's like spin the bottle with nobs on. Woeful stuff.

There was also this thread by YKWIM - http://www.politics.ie/forum/culture-community/197384-cyberbullying-irish-children-cruelest.html
 
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