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What does FFS mean? As for your suggestions: I'm more or less fully grown, and my incomparable sense of direction precludes my getting lost. Perhaps you, with your rather childish and uneducated outlook, illustrated by your chosen idiom, may be rather more in need of a map?1) Zillions of threads on this subject already - we don't need a new one everytime someone has a thought.
2) "Puffer Gilmore" and "Dodger Kenny" - grow up, FFS. Or get lost.